Updated: Nov 30, 2020
5 key tips to implement to drive confidence, empowerment and success
Brief Intro :
There may be a few of you here today who are new to me and my profile thus know very little about me, so here goes a mini whistle stop tour.
Sam Horne; Founder of Supreme Minority. I am a competitive athlete/bodybuilder, a previous eating disorder and disordered eating chaotic mess and found self development and mindset work to set me free from the years of self hate, depression, self sabotage and low confidence/worth - I have always been a massive over thinker and it had held be back TOO LONG!
I have over 18 years experience within the Health and Fitness world, a background in Medical Corporate. After coming to rock bottom myself mentally, physically...ending up homeless, 5 years ago I broadened my scope into the world of NLP, life coaching, emotional intelligence and behaviour change - recently adding Counselling certification in my hybrid blend approach.
I am here to help YOU move past the feelings and emotions that are holding you back, creating you pain and stopping you from becoming the ultimate Supreme Minority that YOU ARE!
I aim to help 1000’s of women just like you to become Diet free, enjoy life and ooze epic confidence….however there is no magic pill, so let’s get to work.
So you want to stop emotional eating and bingeing right?
I bet sometimes you think this cycle of falling off the wagon will never end? That you will never have that body you are confident and happy with when you look in the mirror?
But there are a number of steps you can act upon right now to begin to remove your issues with food...for good!!! You can look amazing all year round, feel confident around food, where before you might worry/avoid/panic and finally reach a level of health and happiness you may have only ever dreamed of.
For this to work - all steps must be taken. No skipping ahead of the game, focus and tick all the boxes. So far, nothing has worked for you so far if you are perhaps reading this? You may yet again think this count be another path to failure as this is what you are so used to around this area of your life - maybe extending into other parts of your personal and professional life also, as it is all the brain knows at times.
So let’s finally address the WHOLE YOU, if you are committed to finally change you will address and work through the whole process outlined here, if you are looking for a quick fix, with no work from yourself….I am sorry to disappoint but this article is not for you.
Let’s get started…..
1. YOU - Your Feelings, emotions, cravings
Having been in the nutrition game myself for many years, it could be quite easy to place the blame on food intake/diet as being the issue of not getting to where you want to be.
But here is the thing - BINGE EATING is an issue around your behaviours and emotions.
Ask yourself where you are at with food - are you calorie counting, macro counting, sticking to a strict food plan? This will often make any issues with food...worse, as we have learnt over time that we can not be trusted around food and feel the need to quantify and adhere to strict rules in order to force the body into doing what you believe it should be doing.
This instant rule enforcement for many will instantly work against your brain, like there is a constant battle going on upstairs of what you want to do but feel you have to do!
But how do we combat this?
Well we need to teach you how to approach food in a way that serves you healthily both mentally and physically and this can by using such tools as visual portioning of your food, learning to understand how your body reacts over a longer period of time than day by day or week by week scale obsessing, listening for the real messages your body is sending you (Is it really physical hunger?), learning how to adjust and adapt yourself from the feedback your body gives you and implementing this into more social situations where you would previously feel you lose control.
Top and bottom of it is to learn about flexibility - having a healthy diet for fat loss does not mean a life of chicken and broccoli (maybe rice if you’re feeling frisky)...just NO!
But this alone will not be the sole resolution to your binge eating my dear….
2.Realise that trying to kid yourself out of emotional eating issues won’t work….
Now I have tried this one myself, I wrote my whole dissertation on the complexity and multifactorial approaches that contribute towards eating disorders at the time when I myself was in this dark hole of Anorexia etc. Upon submitting, I thought ‘Hey I’ve cured myself’, then went in the opposite direction and partied/binged/lacked any kind of care for myself at all. One day I then woke up and realised I needed to get a grip and hit the gym hard to get on stage for my first bikini competition.
The thing is, our Amygdala controls our survival, and hasn’t really advanced since the good old cave man days. It tried to keep us safe, creating our emotions and feelings without much of a second thought, literally!
But this is automatic, not through its level of intellect.
So next time when you question why you can’t ‘just stick to this bloody diet’, call yourself all the names under the sun for not having willpower, remember you are trying to reason with a part of the brain that is not equipped to do that. Think of it like a mini malfunction up there and when certain triggers hit, it sends you to emotional binge moments which in turn results for ‘it’, your survival supposedly.
This is why is can also be hard to let go of, and no matter of willpower will overcome the thoughts like:
‘You deserve a treat, it’s been a hard day’.
‘S**t how did this happen, i’ve eaten the whole bar...again’
‘It’s Sunday, sod it, we start again Monday, I promise.’
Sometimes the feelings can be so overwhelming when you start to think about food, and I have been there, where you feel just to settle your mind, you need to eat whatever it is you are seeing/thinking of.
What do we do in this instance?? -----> We retrain our Amygdalae.
We want to put a halt to it striving for food for survival, we are not in caveman scarcity mode any more right? We can rid of the cravings, compulsions, obsessive thoughts, for good! We can not deal with this part of the brain through reasoning, force nor Willpower, we have to find another way.
When we look at the language we use, often this is not what will resonate with the Amygdala, this area of the brain loves associations, patterns and emotions. And to tap into rewiring it, we must first TURN IT ON. Yes, that means we do the work when those blasted feelings arise yet again, longing for that bag of chips or chocolate bar. From here we can learn to rewrite the code for new behaviour patterns.
3. Moving from Emotional Pain to Pleasure
For many of us we will binge or eat certain foods due to how we feel in a given time, e.g. when we are stressed and we grab a bag of chips/crisps if we are angry, or eat stodgy filling foods when we are left feeling empty/sad.
Eating these foods seeks to control and balance our emotional state, often moving from pain into a state of pleasure, albeit for a short duration for so many of us.
We do this over and over, so a pattern is formed. Every time we feel this ‘feeling’ our brain response is to think ‘food’ as it has associated that with bringing relief, quickly. Over time this then becomes our automatic response and a neural pathway is formed, hardwired into us.
Which, when you crave, you resist at first then feel that mounting desire you can not resist, as you are fighting a habit and a pattern that is SO ingrained!
What we need is for this part of your brain to find these feelings of relief in the same effective, quick way via other means - this comes from meeting these needs from INSIDE YOURSELF.
When we emotionally reach for foods, it is often due to external outside impacts that then affect us internally, there are also a number of other habits or vices people may have (drugs, alcohol, smoking, sex, money…). These external resources create a dependency upon it, they begin to control us - the very thought of taking ‘this thing’ out of our lives will create panic and distress.
The fact is really, you are scared of not being able to meet those deep internal, emotional needs.
Often if we try to ‘give up’ this thing/habit we know isn’t good for us, we often then find it in something else. Those you may know that have given up smoking, then move on to gaining weight due to using foods as their new emotional crutch. Willpower and brute psychological force alone will not make this disappear. Often we are very unaware of these internal unmet needs, so of course we move from thing to thing externally to try and fix/bridge the gap inside of us.
We need this to be an inside job - meeting those needs within ourselves. We become empowered and food on longer is the issue, it’s no longer on the brain 24/7.
4. Strip the Emotional baggage
Often in life there are goals we have, places we want to get to in life, a vision we see ourselves in, yet we don’t manage to get there and do not fulfil our definite potential (Yes we all have buckets of it).
Yes this can be due to bad goal setting and planning, but for many it can also be down to inner emotional blockers, conflicts we have in our unconscious mind.
Whatever your day has thrown at you; always being on edge around others, the need to please everyone, to strive for perfection, lacking in confidence or always over analysing situations, food is without a doubt the thing that is there to offer us comfort, satisfaction, release, satisfying and silencing feelings of not being good enough and to some extent - control.
One of our very basic requirements as humans is the need for self worth, and not in an arrogant fashion, but to feel we bring value to the world.
Many of us lack this due to perhaps childhood interactions, our upbringings or life experiences, nonetheless we all deserve to feel we are worthy. This doesn't just manifest from low self confidence, but also those who are always feeling the need to keep busy in order to feel they are always delivering to those around them, for validation on some level.
Top and bottom, in most scenarios - food = release, to relax, switch off from other thoughts and emotions and enter another world in some cases, acting like a drug of escape.
Food becomes the antidote to escaping pain, and there is no care about the future, just this moment right now. ‘Eat me and escape this pain’.
5. Find your own EFFECTIVE path
Now, just like training and food plans - this is not a one size fits all situation. We all respond differently to various stimuli, events, protocols as no two bodies are replica’s. In order to fully remove binge eating from your life, there is no quick fix, miracle pill, or copy and paste of Sandra’s journey to combat this. You must address these steps and appreciate your own story.
This process takes time, commitment and resilience, it is not an overnight transformation or a simple bandage to mask the underlying true problems.
Each time you try a ‘quick fix’ or ‘diet shake system’ and it does not work, you are yet again building up more of the negative talk tracks and confirmation bias of your failures.
‘Nothing works for me, I am destined to be this way forever’
‘Why can’t I do this? I am useless and I hate myself’
‘Why can't I simply eat and look/feel healthy like everyone else?’
Roll on helplessness, feeling depressed and saddened about what life will be like if you actually carried on in this way, so what do we do, we block it out. We become emotionally and physically numb to the consequences we put ourselves under with our health and future impacts. The scary thing is that when we get to this place, we become truly unfulfilled and unhappy with our lives, however we are not depressed enough to do anything about it due to the numbing of the future visions.
If any of this sounds like you, and you are finally committed to making this shift in mindset, to stop wasting money on another fad diet, or miracle quick fix, then breaking free of this cycle is possible. You just need the right help to do so.
Having a coach to be accountable to, for someone to guide you through the process of this healing and resolve your emotional issues with and around food will step you on to the path of success.
Working with me at Supreme Minority, will give you the tools and structures required to finally overcome your demons with food, we say goodbye to diets, hello epic confidence and food freedom.
All I ask is for you to turn up with buckets of enthusiasm, determination for change and commitment to the process.
If not NOW then WHEN?
P.S: If the time is now, book online for a free ‘boost you’ call with me directly and together let’s work on a whole new you!
To book your call.
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Let’s get to know each other and I look forward to hearing from you soon.